Shits and Giggles
My friend, Joyce, posted this week that she would love to be quiet and mysterious, but she is hilarious and has things to say. Same girl, same. As evidenced here in this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl.
1
Me: I should put a bowl of this Halloween candy in my office in case anyone wants some. Also me: I work from home. Alone.
2
You know, I really hate when I go over to someone's house, and they make me take my shoes off, but they don't even have a bouncy house.
3
I invented a new drink. It's prune juice and vodka. I call it "Shits and Giggles!"
4
How do nudists clean their glasses?
5
I recently got hit in the head with a can of soda. Luckily, it was a soft drink.
6
There was a piece of cake in the fridge with a note stating, "Don't eat me!" Now, there is an empty plate in the fridge with the note, "Don't tell me what to do!"
7
If you come across a snakeskin, it means the snake shed it to grow bigger. Same thing for me if you come across my clothes at the Goodwill.
8
Turns out that hot flashes are just our last fucks burning off.
9
I love this time of year, because I can dig graves in my yard, in broad daylight, and everyone just assumes they're part of my Halloween display.
10
I mean, at this point, I will probably vote for whoever stops texting me first!
Speaking of voting, just do it FFS. You can go in basically anytime between now and the first Tuesday in November to do it. What are you waiting for? If it helps, you can make one of these cocktails to sip on before you head to the ballot box. It might give you the confidence to vote with your heart AND your mind!
Vote for this!
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