Multifucktional
I am Multifucktional - I do too many things all at once while running on fumes and having zero fucks left to give. So here we are. Enjoy this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl. Or don't. I don't care.
1
If you're 50 and want to look younger, tell people you are 60. Follow me for more beauty tips.
2
I was at a wine tasting recently, and a certain blend was described as having no depth. My first thought was, "that sounds like my ex."
3
I have something in my car that alerts me the second I hit 66 in a 65mph zone. We've been married for 27 years.
4
Along those lines, someone asked me which kid stresses me out the most. My answer? My mother-in-law's kid.
5
Why don't they call veterinarians Dogtors?
6
Y'all ever bought a pack of underwear, take them out of the packaging and be like, "Dang! Those are big!?!" Then you put them on and they fit?
7
I wonder if my recorded call has ever been used for training or quality purposes.
8
I am listening to a murder mystery on Audible. The kidnappers tell the hero to come unaccompanied to a warehouse and walk 20 paces west to find them. Well, sorry hostage, but if they send me to save you, can kiss your life away, because I would have no fucking clue which way to go.
9
I won't answer an unknown number, but I'll follow a cardboard sign into the woods because it says "estate sale."
10
The older I get, the more I realize that society is held together by exhausted women muttering, "For God's sake, I'll just do it myself."
It's officially "surprise in your winter coat from last winter" season. I had a surprise addition to my espresso martini this week that was delightful, so I thought I would share. Make the martini however you'd like, add this boozy whipped cream to the top and sprinkle with nutmeg and cinnamon. Drinking pie has never tasted so good! (Disclaimer - you can clearly see that it tells you not to refrigerate this product. They're serious. Don't do it. I tried that once, and I had to cut the top off the can to get the stuff to come out. #determination)
Whip it good!
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