Eatable

The Boozy Weathergirl
Jan 8
2 min read

It amazes me that an entire year has gone by, and I have not lost weight or become a better person. Oh well. Here's this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl.

1

I love having my kid home from college. I really do. But what I don't love is the fact that I can no longer whip my bra off and wear pajamas as soon as I walk in the door after work, because I have no idea when her friends will be coming over.

2

When they were coming up with words, why did someone choose "edible" over "eatable?"

3

Although I am anti-resolution for the new year, I did think of a few things I could try to improve in my life. Like folding the clothes as soon as they come out of the dryer. Seems simple enough, right? Well, it's not, and I am still the same domestic failure I was eight days ago.

4

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I'm late for the house.

5

I love when people say stupid shit like, "Choose happiness!" Like I intentionally ordered up some anxiety with a side of emotional repression and dread.

6

I was thinking of my childhood, and I have to say that I really thought I would be offered free drugs from strangers far more frequently than the zero times that it has actually happened.

7

Then I started to think about my adult life. I looked at my bank account and thought to myself, "Imagine a world where you received a refund on all the money you spent on alcohol..."

8

If you feel slighted or ignored by the lack of a holiday card you received from me, I promise that if I sent out holiday cards, I would send one to you. Stop thinking that you are not on my list, because I can assure you, there is no list.

9

I'd like to borrow from Jeff Foxworthy's Redneck schtick by starting a "You might be in peri/menopause if" segment. Here goes - You might be in peri/menopause if you can recall the exact smell of a Strawberry Shortcake doll's hair. Feel free to send me other experiences, past or present, to include in future musings.

10

I heard mansplaining described as "correctile dysfunction." Please excuse me while I laugh hysterically for the next hour.

It should come as no surprise that I have some risqué friends. One of them suggested I share this recipe in honor of her. The name alone should paint the picture. And, while she's not, she definitely could be! Here's to everyone's inner porn star!