Binge-worthy

The Boozy Weathergirl
Jun 25, 2025
3 min read

Roses are red. Mornings are hard. I suck at poetry. Coffee. You can wax poetic as you discuss this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl.

1

I'm at that point in life where my mind truly believes I'm in my 20s, my humor suggests I'm in my teens, and my body's convinced it's dead and is waiting for a resurrection.

2

Speaking of age, my family was recently discussing the titles of eras, like "The Roaring 20s." My dad, who is about to hit another milestone tomorrow, said that he will be part of "The Snoring 80s."

3

Do you want to watch a 10-hour movie? No. How about if they break it up into ten, hour-long episodes and you watch it all in one sitting. Now we're talkin'!

4

Again, speaking of, I'd like to give a shout out to all my married/committed peeps out there, just waiting for their partners to fall asleep, so they can watch what they really want to watch.

5

Who decided that brussel sprouts were a "thing?" Don't get me wrong - I love ordering them when I'm out just as much as the next person. But, like, what culinary genius sat around and thought, "Hummm? Which bitter, forgotten vegetable can we exploit by sticking them on a wooden board, adding all kinds of cheeses and random fruits to them and get people to pay beaucoop bucks for as an appetizer, even though they make your farts smell like a sewer rat died in your ass for days afterward?"

6

Pretty sure I recently shared my re-found love of The Greyhound - vodka and grapefruit juice. What I forgot about was sipping that cocktail after showering and brushing my teeth. I think we should institute that as a national torture tactic for prisoners of war. Repeated playing of the song, "What Does the Fox Say," along with a mouthful of grapefruit juice and toothpaste should break someone down quickly.

7

Fun fact for today - even if a bear is wearing shoes and socks, he/she will still have bear feet.

8

Sometimes, my large breasts discourage me. Like when I am dress shopping or golfing. But other times, I am thankful for them, because I really don't need people making eye contact with me.

9

Many of my friends are newly single and on dating apps. While I have giggled at a lot of what they've shown me about the descriptions people use for themselves, which are often HIGHLY inaccurate, I did come to appreciate the 5'4" man who described himself as "fun sized." Please, Shawn and Morgan, make sure that my gravestone (or at least my obituary) tells everyone that I was "fun-sized barrel of sarcasm and joy."

10

Today I learned that the average person consumes 9 alcoholic drinks per week. Today I also learned that I am above average.

Things did not go as smoothly as desired as I wrote this. So, I tried twitching my nose to right things, but then I remembered, I'm a bitch, not a witch. But even a bitch can craft a tasty party shot. How fun would this one be at a Purple Rain-themed shindig? Try it out!