Laugh Lines

The Boozy Weathergirl
3 days ago
2 min read

According to a study I made up, people who like my posts are smarter, happier and better-looking than others. And those who follow Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl are the best at all of those. You're welcome.

1

The best part about having my kid home is that I can leave the house in the morning and come back at lunch, and she never even knew I left the house.

2

I finally cleaned out my junk drawer. If you need the CD to reinstall Windows 95, you know who to call.

3

I just caught a glimpse of my laugh lines in the mirror. I really don't remember anything being THAT funny.

4

Sometimes I get road rage walking behind people in the grocery store.

5

Life can be a dick. Sometimes it gets hard for no reason.

6

My toxic trait is being ridiculously informed about completely useless information. Curiosity told me to look it up on the internet, and now, hours later, I have a PhD in nonsense.

7

If I were a Transformer, I would be Amazon Prime.

8

I would say that I am pretty chill. As long as I don't get irritated in any way whatsoever.

9

Hi, autocorrect. Letting you know that I would never type, "he'll yeah!" Just like I am never talking about ducks.

10

Some people think twice before drinking. I drink twice before thinking. We are not the same.

Next time you're not feeling it at work, just block off your calendar as PTO - Pouring Titos Often. I'm spilling the tea about this simple, refreshing pick-me-up that will hold you totally accountable to your "meeting agenda."