Those Summer Nights

The Boozy Weathergirl
Aug 10, 2022
4 min read

Updated: Jun 19, 2024

My heart was not the first heart broken this week when I heard of the loss of Olivia Newton John. I'm hoping to parallel some of ONJ's best lyrics with fun times at the beach in this week's Deep Thoughts Thursday with The Boozy Weathergirl.

1

"Let's get physical" - well folks, after walking through the sand to where I wanted to plop my fat ass in a chair for the day, I think I need to get A physical to make sure I'm not about to drop dead from merely moving. My body is talking, loudly, and the only way I am getting horizontal is when they drag me off the beach on a stretcher.

2

"Grease is the word" - I know this is not her song. Whatever. But why can't they come up with a spray machine, or something more accurate than my hands, which can evenly distribute sunscreen onto my body? And why does this magical cancer-protecting lotion have to be so greasy? Can't it go on and feel like a cool sheen, rather than making you feel like the lube queen as soon as it hits your skin? And why can't the protection last longer?!? I'd be all for a sheer body condom to wear to the beach that only lets in helpful, tanning rays and filters out the bad stuff. Where my engineers at?

3

"Let me be there" - This is the lyrical line that repeats itself over and over in your head once you return from a beach day or vacay and realize you're back to being the boring pencil pusher you need to be, just to be able to afford some days off to go to the beach.

4

"Please Mr, Please" - This can go one of two ways at the beach. The first is when you see a cute guy drinking a thirst-quenching alcoholic beverage in the sand, and you realize you forgot yours at home, so you beg him to let you partake in his fun. The second adaptation is after you've had a few too many of these bevies, and you're standing in the bathroom line, begging the guy in the port-o-potty to hurry up before your bladder explodes (provided that you're like me and your body literally paralyzes urinal function when in the ocean.)

5

"Xanadu" - The mere utterance of this word invokes a vision of utopia that can only be found when you're sitting on a sunny beach, cold drink in your hand, toes in the sand, and a cool breeze blows through your hair, just like it did while ONJ was roller skating in the movie. If it gets warm enough, and you dehydrate, you might even hallucinate and think of the lovely blonde beauty descending from the sky with the drink just for you, Xanadu.

6

"A little more love" - What you wish your whiny family had toward you for the wonderful freaking outing you planned for them in a beach day. There is no consideration for the time spent packing chairs, towels, lunches, snacks, drinks. Driving hours to get there with a killer playlist queued up. Paying fees to enter. And all you need them to do is carry the shit from the car to the beach without complaining. But nooooo. That never happens.

7

"Have you never been mellow?" - This comment is directed at the family member and/or friend that has to always be doing something at the beach. They're playing frisbee or Can Jam, taking a walk, pacing, whatever. Have you never tried to just sit down and be, dammit? I'd like to offer these people some "gummy bears" to help them chill the fuck out and enjoy the waves.

8

"Hopelessly devoted to you" - These lyrics are dedicated to the friends who, like others who only vacation in one spot year after year, will not venture to any place other than their favorite beach. And if they do, they just constantly compare it to their beach, pointing out only shortcomings, which leads you to go back to the lyrics for #7. #stfu

9

"Suddenly, the wheels are in motion" - This is when you hear or see something that triggers the thought that you NEED to schedule a beach getaway. For me, this generally happens after a few too many cocktails, sitting at a computer, being coaxed by a friend to book a trip I have neither the time nor the money for, but, YOLO, so I go.

10

"We go to together" - Simply put - you, an ice-cold beverage and the beach. Like rama lama lama ka dinga da dinga dong. End of story.

I'm quite sure that anyone benefitting from royalties coming from "Grease" made enough to enjoy a kick-ass beach trip this week. Cheers to the Pop Queen and her Magic as she takes her final drive in Greased Lightning to the Heavens.